Wed 17 Jan 2007

<<<...MARKETING...>>>

1. You see a gorgeous girl at a party, you go up to her & say,"I am very rich, Marry me...!!!" This is Direct Marketing.

2. You are at a party with a bunch of frndz & see a gorgeous girl. One of ur frnd gossips to her & pointing at you, says "He is very rich. Marry Him". That is Advertising. 

3. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her & get her telephone number. The next day you call & say,"Hi, I am very rich, Marry me." That is Telemarketing. 

4. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her & say," I am very rich, Marry Me." She gives you a nice hard slap on ur face. That is Customer's Feedback  

5. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say: "I am very rich. Marry me!" And she introduces you to her husband. - That's demand and supply gap.

6. You're at a party and see gorgeous girl. You get up and straighten your tie, you walk up to her and pour her a drink, you open the door (of the car)for her, pick up her bag after she drops it, offer her ride and then say:"By the way, I'm rich. Will you marry me?" - That's Public Relations

7. You're! at a party and see gorgeous girl. She walks up to you and says: "You are very rich! Can you marry ! me?" - That's Brand Recognition.

8. You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say anything, another person come and tell her: "I'm rich. Will you marry me?" and she goes with him - That's competition eating into your market share.

9. You see and gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and before you say: "I'm rich Marry me!" your wife arrives. - That's restriction for entering new markets. 

 

Tags:
Categories : Knowledge / Amazing
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Fri 12 Jan 2007

• “By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher” - Socrates

• "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't.” - Patrick Murray

• I recently read that love is entirely a matter of chemistry. That must be why my wife treats me like toxic waste. - David Bissonette

• When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.- Sacha Guitry

• After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.-  Hemant Joshi

• Woman inspires us to great things, and prevents us from achieving them. - Dumas

• The great question... which I have not been able to answer...is, "What does a woman want? - Sigmund Freud

• I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me. - Anonymous

• "Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes

Tuesdays, I go Fridays."-  Henny Youngman

• "I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years." - Sam Kinison

• "There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." - James Holt McGavran

• Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming: 1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it (2). Whenever you're right, shut up. - Nash

• The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once... - Anonymous

• You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to. - Henny Youngman

• My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met. - Rodney Dangerfield

• A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong. - Milton Berle

• Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy. - Anonymous

• A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters. They all said the same thing: "You can have mine." - Anonymous

• First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!" Second Guy: "You're lucky, mine's still alive."

Tags:
Categories : Thoughts / Lessons
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Thu 4 Jan 2007

Guess the words :

 
1. man
-----------
  board
 
Ans. = man overboard
 
2. stand
------------
       i
 
Ans. = I understand
 
OK?....get the hang of it? Let's try a few now & see how you fare?
 
3. /r/e/a/d/i/n/g/
 
Ans. = reading between the lines
 
4. r
  road
   a
   d
 
Ans. = cross road
5. cycle
   cycle
   cycle
 
 
Ans. = tricycle
 
6. t
   o
   w
   n
 
Ans. = downtown
 
7. le /
     / vel
    /
 
Ans. = split level
 
8 . 0
------------
   M.D.
   Ph.D.
 
 
Ans. = two degrees below zero
 
 
9. knee
------------
   light
 
 
Ans. = neon light (knee-on-light)
 
10. ii ii
-----------
     O O
 
Ans. = circles under the eyes
 
11. cover
---------
      cop
 
 
Ans. = undercover cop
 
12. dice
     dice
 
 
Ans. = paradise
 
13. t
     o
     u
     c
     h
 
Ans. = touchdown
 
14. ground
---------------
     feet
     feet
     feet
     feet
     feet
     feet
 
 
Ans. = six feet underground
 
 
15. he's / himself
 
Ans. = he's by himself
 
16. ecnalg
 
 
Ans. = backward glance
 
 
17. death / life
 
 
Ans. = life after death
 
18. THINK
 
Ans. thinks big !!
 
19. going
---------
    ccc
 
 
Ans. Going overseas
 
 
And the last one is.............. see if you can guess this !!!
 
20. ababaaabbbbaaaabbbbababaabbaaabbbb....
 
Ans. long time, no c

    

 
Q. If you had three apples and four oranges in one hand and four apples and three oranges in the
other hand, what would you have?
A. Very large hands.
 
 
Q. How can you lift an elephant with one hand?
A. It is not a problem, since you will never find an elephant with one hand.
 
 
Q. How can a man go eight days without sleep?
A. He sleeps at night.
 
 
Q. If you throw a red stone into the blue sea what it will become?
A. Wet.
 
 
Q. What looks like half apple?
A : The other half.
 
 
Q. What can you never eat for breakfast?
A : Dinner.
 
 
Q. What gets wet with drying?
A : A towel.
 
 
Q. What happened when wheel was invented?
A : It caused a revolution.
 
 
Q. Why is it easy to weigh a fish?
A : Because it has its own scales.
 
 
Q. Bay of Bengal is in which state?
A : Liquid

  Q. Interviewer said "I shall either ask you ten easy questions or one really difficult question. Think well before you make up your mind!"A. The boy thought for a while and said, "my choice is one really difficult question.""Well, good luck to you, you have made your own choice! Now tell me this: "What comes first, Day or Night?" The boy was jolted into reality as his admission depends on the correctness of his answer, but he thought for a while and said, "It's the DAY sir!""How" the interviewer asked,"Sorry sir,you promised me that you will not ask me a SECOND difficult question!"  

 
Tags: ,
Categories : Knowledge / Amazing
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